It’s the buzzword of the decade - authentic. It’s what we have to display on social media in order to fit in. It’s the key to avoiding being labeled “fake”, “robotic”, “curated”. In this push for more authentic life representations on social media, the demand for authenticity has instead created its own twist on curation.
Emphasis on “rawness”
Y’all, enough with the teary face pictures. I don’t know who started this trend, but lately I’ve seen a number of people with selfies of their tear streaked, red, or actively crying faces. It’s the latest escalation in the demand for raw emotion.Because rawness is where it’s at for authenticity right now.
Demand for intimacy
I’ve heard people say that they like it when others are “vulnerable” on social media, but it’s more than vulnerability. The act of being vulnerable creates an intimacy between two people. It’s an act of trust. But what are we trusting? That the post will get liked? That people will engage with the post? That offers of help will come our way?I’m personally a fan of how social media has become a method to ask for prayer intentions and seek community in isolating situations. What I don’t think is healthy is the demand for intimacy. That that kind of vulnerability and sharing is considered a necessary part of being authentic. I think once intimacy is demanded that sense of safety and trust deteriorates, and those kinds of posts become more about signifying that you share a struggle than about connection.
Consequences for oversharing
But goodness help you if you overshare. That's right. "Authentic" demands letting strangers into your intimate moments and your weakness, but it's a minefield to determine when that intimacy suddenly becomes "oversharing". Not to mention the consequences of setting up a trust in a group that owes you nothing, that can remain nameless, faceless, if they so choose.This is my life, not a documentary or a reality show.
I think "authenticity" is a ridiculous notion. Ultimately, none of us really "put it all out there" on social media - either by deliberate omission or just lack of interest in discussing part of our lives. I find it frustrating that people with a public presence, even on my own tiny itty-bitty blog, are expected to be sharing all the bad and the ugly in order to be "authentic". Yet those same people that celebrate when misery is shared by others, keep their own weaknesses to themselves. They afford themselves a space and privacy that they refuse to those they consider public property.
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I think there is SO MUCH to discuss on this topic that it's become sort of a mini-series here on Under Thy Roof. Other posts on the surprise series are:
Hmm, yes, it can be difficult to strike the right balance of sharing in this social media world that we are all still learning how to navigate. Sharing can be really beautiful when it is done right. Hopefully if we take a prayerful approach to our social media presence, we can avoid some of these pitfalls.
ReplyDeleteI think intimacy isn’t really possible on an open-formal social media account. It’s one thing to be open, but at its best this leads to IRL conversations or one-on-one email correspondence!
ReplyDeleteThis is a tough topic! I enjoy both beauty and authenticity in social media...I appreciate when people admit their struggles and I also just like looking at beautiful things (decor, clothes, etc.). I tend to error on the side of openness but I also get your point that we can easily lean on that too much. I will say that if I'm sharing something 'vulnerable' via my blog it's usually not to get likes or followers but simply sharing my heartthoughts and knowing the Lord can use them for someone else who might be struggling with a similar thing but that I wouldn't otherwise come in contact with IRL.
ReplyDeleteI'm also thinking that I'm not seeing the posts that inspired your post. Have never even heard of or seen the teary faces posts! Sounds odd!!
ReplyDeleteI think you're approaching vulnerability the right way. There's definitely a *good* way to share struggles!
DeleteThe teary faces posts just broke a line in me. I feel like the demands of authenticity keep ramping up. It's not enough to write them out, or take a picture of a messy spot in your life, now evidence of your literal tears are required. It's a shock value way of reaching for empathy, and I don't think it's necessary or helpful in the long run.
Agree. That kind of reminds me when people used to post Facebook statuses about being depressed, etc., just in hopes (or what I'd assume in hopes) of getting some encouragement or affirmation. NOT the place at all! If they need help, it needs to be IRL! So much online can be misinterpreted either taken less serious or more serious. People need an IRL community for that sort of thing, and maybe that's the problem. Our social media obsessed world doesn't know how to create real community very well.
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