Our topic with The Zelie Group for the month of January is "Quiet". Quiet is often longed for my moms, with many feeling like they never achieve it. I live a very busy life, home with two little kids during the day and dancing or rehearsing at night, yet I still feel like I live a quiet life.

I believe quiet is largely an inner state. My life is busy but it isn't stressful. It's hard but it's not overwhelming. Quiet, for me, is finding that inner balance and healthy mental place. Here are the practical ways I make quiet happen.

Commit to a 20 Minute Prayer Something

A surprisingly large number of prayers and devotions only take 20 minutes. I alternate between praying a rosary, reflecting on the mass readings of the day, and prayer journaling in my prayer time. I've found that I need to treat prayer like an exercise, it's a muscle that gets stronger the more you use it. Just like with my physical workouts, I do better when I vary my spiritual workouts.

Find Your Rest Time

I commit to the first hour of nap time as my rest time. During this time I cannot work on emails, write blog posts, check social media, workout or memorize lines. (During Lent this also becomes a no tech time too.)

This is the single best choice I have made for managing my time during the day. I have the type of personality that really will work non-stop from when I wake up to when I go to sleep. I have to schedule my rest and provide incentives to myself. I only watch my Netflix shows during this time. I will make DIY foot soaks, try out new face masks, make a tea tray for myself, or just listen to a whole music album.

It's the beginning of naptime so if we have a very short nap day rest has happened. I've found rest has to be a priority or it won't happen.

Ask For What You Need

In order to make the space for quiet in a busy life, you have to do some personal discernment to understand what that means for you. Is actual silence a requirement for you? Do you need to leave the house? Do you need a buddy to help keep you accountable for praying or resting? Are there thought patterns and blocks for you to mentally quiet down? If so, can you talk with your spouse, a friend, a priest, spiritual director, or counselor to work out how to break down those mental barriers?

There's going to be some trial and error, but it is worth the effort.

Recoup Your Lost Time

If your struggle is simply finding the time that isn't filled with daily tasks, work on clearing up the time clutter. Is there a way to cut down on laundry or cooking time? You could streamline some of your daily routines or make some set routines. Are you always searching for things? Perhaps it's time to do some purging and organization.

Maybe you get surprised by time. Sometimes an appointment is late, I'm waiting for the bus longer than expected, or I have a 20 minute walk between locations. I always have a rosary in my purse so I can pray on the walk home from the park, and I bring along my current book so I can sneak in a chapter if the opportunity arises. The goal is to have the ability to do the things that mean "quiet" to you when you have the chance to do them. Carpe diem!

Do these things sound helpful to you? What brings quiet into your life? Do you have a totally different definition of quiet from me? I'd love to hear about it!
Post your answer in the comments or link up your own post!



*********

And here's My Sunday Best: Torrential Downpour Edition!
We're experiencing an "atmospheric river" right now. It sounds like it's going to be fun.

Infinity Veil: Veils by Lily
Necklace: Family heirloom
Dress: Hand me down from a college hallmate
Tights and Boots: Target

How To Cheat Fancy Food + Holiday Recipe Exchange

With the holidays here, lots of people are hosting more parties and get togethers than they normally would. For Catholics, this is also a time when it feels like the Church decided to squeeze as many big feasts in as possible! So you want to make things special but have it be quick and simple? Here's how I cheat make fancy food.

Have a "fancy" condiment or sauce

Easiest way to swanky-up a dish is to tie it together with a condiment or sauce that seems fancy, but is actually very quick and easy to put together.

My favorites are:

• Siracha Mayo
• Dill Tarter Sauce
• Tabasco Ketchup

Two of those things are literally two other prepared condiments you probably have in your kitchen mixed together!

But it's a two part name thus fancy.

My Dill Tarter Sauce is:

2 part Mayo

1 part Relish

1 part Lemon Juice

Half part Dried Dill

Stir and serve! The flavor will grow a little stronger if you let it sit for an hour+ in the fridge.

Use some restaurant plating tricks

If you're hosting a dinner party, you can take your dinner plates up a notch by doing the finishing touches with a few restaurant plating tips.

If you have chives, paprika, cinnamon or anything else that requires sprinkling on top at the end, wait until you've plated the food then sprinkle on top by putting the ingredient in a regular spoon and distribute by tapping your hand instead of shaking the spoon. You'll get a much more even distribution, and it will instantly look more professional.

I don't have one at home yet, but loading olive oil or whatever sauce or dressing you are using in a plastic squeeze bottle and drizzling with that looks amazing.

Make a Fun Drink

Did you know it's actually really easy to make your own mulled wine, spiced apple cider, or Chai tea?

The secret to making them "fancy" is to use whole spices. It also makes them easier to make. 

I think the mulled wine and the spiced apple cider have the plus of being made in a slow cooker and thus will make your home smell AMAZING when people walk in.

If you know you will be making a lot of such things, I'd recommend buying in bulk either online or in store. I've used My Spice Sage before for things like Star Anise and Smoked Paprika and had a good experience. 

If you're into cocktails, my current favorite trick is adding in a burnt orange garnish.

Peel off a little bit (thumb length) of orange zest. Twist it to release some of the orange oil. Swill the zest on the rim of the glass to add a little pop of flavor. Then, my favorite part, light it on fire for about 2-3 seconds then drop it in the drink.

It gives it a smoky citrus flavor. I love to do this with Manhattans, Old Fashions, certain Gin Martinis would probably be good with it too.

Adding the burnt orange also lets you add onto the drink name (i.e. Burnt Orange Manhattan).

Like I said above, multi-part name = fancy!

*************

Want some easy recipes to try out this holiday season?
Here are two of my favorites, free as a thank you to you!
Click to open downloadable/printable versions.

Visit the other members of The Zelie Group bloggers to get their recipes in our virtual holiday recipe exchange!

Anni at A Beautiful, Camouflaged, Mess of A Life
Brittany at Everyday Thoughts
Chiara at Catholic Pearl
Ginny at Not So Formulaic
Jessica at Pinot Noir and Prayers
Kerry at Fishbowl Fortune

Faith Formation For When You Don't Know How To Teach Faith

Linking up with The Zelie Group for JEI (Just Enough Info).

Faith Formation is an essential part of Catholic parenting, and I mean that quite literally (see CCC 2226-7), but so many of us have circumstances that may have prevented us from learning how to actually do Catholic faith formation.
Maybe you're a convert and didn't grow up with faith.
Maybe you grew up Catholic but now feel shaky about how to explain the teachings of the Church. Maybe you just never learned this stuff period.
There is hope! So many (dare I say, most?) people are in one of the above categories. So let's huddle together and figure this out!

1. Do your children attend your parish’s religious education program?

As far as I know, our parish only has formal faith formation for sacrament prep. Since my kids have another two or so years until First Communion, all the faith formation has to be done at home.

Our current at home program, Little Lambs from Family Formation, is ideally done as a whole parish program. The idea with that is 1 lesson a month is at the parish and it involves talks for the parents and grade level classes for the kids. For the other 3 weeks the lessons are done by the parents at home, drawing on the training they just had in the parish class.

We are loving doing the program at home, but there are lots of times when I can see how awesome it would be to be doing these with a least a few other families.

2. Do you or have you ever taught religious education? Tell us about it.

I used to assist in the 2nd Grade CCD class at my home parish in high school. 2nd Grade was our typical grade for First Communion and I loved getting to do things like practice commissions (a sister recommended Neco wafers as practice hosts).

Honestly, the best part was seeing the how incredibly excited all the little kids were for their First Communion. Little kid excitement is hilarious and adorable.

3. What are your favourite religious education resources for kids?

Obviously I'm partial to Family Formation, but here are the other things we use.

The Golden Children's Bible

We read from this pretty much every morning. It takes it's time telling the story, and I like how it puts the Gospels in sequence. AKA. Instead of having Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, etc. it tells the story in the order those events (probably) occurred. I think that makes it a lot easier on little kids to learn the outline of the Gospel stories in sequence.

CCC Saint Movies

I grew up with these movies, and I think they still win for teaching little kids about saints via media.

Magnifikid

The kid version of Magnificat, it's a monthly subscription geared for kids 6-12 years. 

From their website: "Every week, MagnifiKid offers:

• All the readings and the prayers of the Sunday Mass with explanations of the difficult words and the meaning of the rituals;
• A suggested prayer for Morning and Evening;
• Many suggestions on how to live the entire week with the Lord;
• Various games, a comic, and activities to help children learn about Christian life and culture;
• A page intended for the parents with suggestions for family prayers."

I could see this being a fantastic gift for a kid's First Communion!

But the ultimate faith formation resource is YOU! Nothing beats having a parent who is also learning and growing their faith. If you want a simple place to start, check out Catholic Truths for Our Children by Patti Armstrong. 

************

Your turn! Answer the questions in our own blog post or in the comments. 

Here they are again:

1. Do your children attend your parish’s religious education program? 

2. Do you or have you ever taught religious education? Tell us about it.

3. What are your favourite religious education resources for kids?

A Few Texan Secrets for Hospitality

I learned a lot of tricks for hosting, cooking, and cleaning while growing up in Texas. When I moved out to California, it became apparent that people were not aware of the tips and tricks that go into the image of southern hospitality. 

It's not as hard as it looks y'all. Pinky promise. 

Here's a few of my Texan secrets to hospitality. 

1. What's your go-to "someone's coming over" recipe?

I have aspirations of being that person with cookie dough ready to go from the freezer. But the reality is I kind of hate baking, I'm not a sweets person, and I'd rather sip then nibble.

If it's a last minute get together - I put some coffee on, pull a dip together, and I don't sweat it.

For planned dinners, I lean on the crockpot. This is one of my absolute favorites. I like to add some thickly cut potatoes, carrots, and onion for the chicken to cook on. After the chicken is done cooking, lift out the veggies with a slotted spoon and broil in the oven until golden brown. Delicious!
Sometimes, if I get ambitious, I'll make a gravy out of the remaining drippings. Or I leave it in the crockpot to become part of the chicken stock I'll make from the bones of the meal later.

I don't like to always serve the same thing, but I do hold a general "recipe" of sorts in my head when thinking about a company dinner: a protein, a veggie, a "base", a sauce or dressing, and something sweet or umami.

I prefer to think of the carbs as a base instead of a starch. I use them more as a staging grounds for the protein instead of a side. Polenta/grits or mashed potatoes are some of my go tos, and focaccia is one of my favorite breads to make and serve. I also love wide egg noodles. Because if it's big, it's fancy (I don't make these rules, I just acknowledge them.)

Every good southern girl knows the secret to making a dish fancy is adding a glaze, sauce, or dressing. I have a lot of go to easy ones, but I'm starting to think I should just make another whole post about this.

On to the next question!

2. You have 5 minutes to tidy before guest arrive. What are your tidying shortcuts?

Baskets - everywhere.

It's like some sort of rule with kids that their main method of picking up is throwing everything into a basket. So I roll with it. The only toys allowed in the living room right now are our "Advent toys" aka Little People Nativity Sets and it's got it's own basket. All other toys have to live in the kid bedroom, and also get thrown into baskets for picking up.

So do kid books. So does dirty laundry. It works. It allows me to give a useful assignment to the kids while I tackle the bigger cleaning chores.

Vacuum as you go

The extra step of making a nice sweeping pile and using a dustpan might not be in my 5 minute cleaning budget. Solution - vacuum! I have a cordless vacuum that will switch quickly from floor to carpet and get be lifted up to quickly get the sofa and upholstered chairs.

Start from the door

I start cleaning from where guests will enter and prioritize from there. You know your home's hotspots. Mine are: entry way, table surfaces, sofa, bathroom surfaces. I take the vacuum with me to the front door, and start going!

3. What sort of music sets the mood for the perfect gathering?

I'm generally a country music girl (Texan roots don't die), but my current trick for making a gathering more cozy is playing this:

Nothing like the sweet sweet sound of a crackling fire. 

****************

Your turn! Answer the questions in your own post or in the comments below. Here they are again:

1. What's your go-to "someone's coming over" recipe?

2. You have 5 minutes to tidy before guest arrive. What are your tidying shortcuts?

3. What sort of music sets the mood for the perfect gathering? 

Next Week we're talking Faith Formation!

1. Do your children attend your parish’s religious education program? 

2. Do you or have you ever taught religious education? 

3. What is your favourite religious education resource for kids?

7 Tips for Posting a Picture a Day as a Busy Mom

Linking up with This Ain't The Lyceum for 7 Quick Takes!

The Zelie Group is hosting a photo challenge for Advent! 

I love photo challenges! I might not be able to blog as often as I like (especially that the busy liturgical season meets production time this year!), but I can pull off posting a picture a day. 

Here's my top 7 tips for posting a picture a day as a busy mom.

1

Take your own "stock" photos

When we're somewhere beautiful or the light happens to be good, I snap a picture. I do it often enough that I've developed my own stash of stock photos. There is often more more than one thing beautiful about a place, but if I were to put them all up at once those individually beautiful moments might get missed. Posting them later, or using them for blog images, allows for more beauty to be appreciated.

2

Backup your pictures

One problem you will run into when you start to take more photos - lack of storage space! I love the Shoebox app for backing up photos. It has unlimited photo storage and it's easy to download a picture back to my camera roll when I want to use it.

I can free up storage space from the app, it asks if it can delete photos once they have been securely backed up. Pro tip: clean out your deleted photos folder to free up space right away (iPhones store photos for 30 days post deletion otherwise.)

3

Think ahead

I like to be thinking about the photo prompts about a week ahead. If I see something that might work for one of those prompts, I snap a picture. 

It can sometimes be helpful to think in terms of what you want to say about that prompt and let your picture ideas flow from that. I love seeing when people take a creative take on a prompt!

4

Save the photo prompts as a phone screen

Sometimes the hardest thing is remembering what photo prompts are coming up! I like to save the prompt image on my phone lock screen so I see it every time I go to use my phone.

5

Write a good caption

Because it's not just about the picture! Tell us why you thought to take a picture of this moment - what about it speaks to you? Share your unique voice!

6

It doesn't need to be perfect

I feel like this photo captures our day really well: a little off, with a hungry Therese and John is just a blur.

Yes we're all trying our best to convey something beautiful, but we're not professional photographers! (At least I'm not.) Give it your best shot, but sometimes you are going to be left with options that are blurry, slightly out of focus, or have weird light. Own it! 

I want to see your life the way you see it at your most optimistic. Maybe your light is weird because it is winter wonderland outside and snow does funny things. Tell us about it. Don't let the photography learning curve stop you!

7

Embrace the ridiculous 

Because sometimes life is just ridiculous. Take for example this shot from the preparations for my daughter's birthday party:

She had a cake themed party and I was trying to make a gluten free bread for the smorgastorta. 

It was terrible. Absolutely horrendous. Wanna talk learning curve? Gluten free baking. It's hard!

When I pulled this result out of the oven, I was at the point of laughing or crying. I chose to laugh, and buy some gluten free bread from a store, and I took this picture of my hard won failure.

*******************

Hope you found some of these helpful!

The Advent photo challenge starts on Sunday (same as Advent!).

Get in on the fun by tagging your pictures on Facebook or Instagram with #thezeliegroup, #TZG_photochallenge, and #TZG_advent2016.

If you tag me in your pictures (@underthyroof) I'll be sure to come comment and see how your Advent is going!

Happy Thanksgiving 2016

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Today we're hoping to have a good meal, give thanks for our many blessings, and manage to have a nice day. I'm going to rush off to sing at mass (BTW, can someone explain why we have official collects for civic holidays? National patron saint feasts I get, but this just seems weird.) before I do that, have some JEI fun with The Zelie Group!

1. Do you have to cook for Thanksgiving? If yes, what’s on the menu? If no, high five!

We have been assigned to bring the yam dish for Thanksgiving dinner with my husband's side of the family who lives about two hours south of us. I'm still trying to develop a taste for for sweet potatoes, but we're bringing this one.

Our big cooking day was really Sunday when we had our friendsgiving (YAMMsgiving with our young adult group). We made turkey, people brought sides, tons of the leftover wine and cheese from Swing Dance the night before. Good company, good food, plenty of drink and plenty of babies - what's not to love?

"Turkey? I eat it in my mouth?"

2. What famous person would you like to invite to your family Thanksgiving?

Easy, the Pope. Specifically, I think it would be fun to invite a couple different Popes. I figure many of them never got to meet each other, nor did they know who the future Pope would be even if they did meet.

I'm thinking Francis, JPII, Leo XIII, Pius X, John XXIII, and Peter.

Everyone but Francis has, probably, already met each other in heaven so what kind of insights would they have? It would be the best Thanksgiving dinner ever!

3. Excluding family, health and basic needs met - what are 3 things that you are thankful for?

That's right, all the safe responses to this question are excluded!

Ok here I go:

Friends who roll with it when I message/text/email/call/accost at a party with something that starts with "hey, crazy idea, but...." So many of the things I do (Swing dance events, liturgical year parties, etc.) start from getting friends on board with my crazy idea. Somehow I have ended up with a lot of introverted friends who can handle my extroverted intensity. When we work together awesome things happen!

A body that is strong and able to keep up with what I ask of it. I've just past one year of being back to dancing, and now I'm adding acting on top of that. I have days that start at 6:45am and end with class or rehearsal getting out between 9pm-10pm most weekdays. It can be hard, but it's what I love to do. I'm so blessed that I can push my mind and body and have it be a reasonable expectation that I will be able to meet my goals.

Part of this is also I'm so grateful to have had encouraging and constructively critical friends, ballet teachers, directors, and fellow dancers and actors who have helped me push myself in helpful ways (and not crash and burn.)

A husband who has worked with me to create a way of living that allows us to pursue our dreams and still have time as a family. It would not be possible for me to go for auditions, attend rehearsals, go to conferences, or ballet class if not for my husband. We've worked it out that he leaves for work early, which gives him time for a run, and allows him to get home about 4:30pm most days. We're able to have an unrushed family dinner and have a good hour and a half, or more, before I have to leave for rehearsal or class. We collaborate to make dinner happen, and I am confident that the kids will be perfectly fine going to bed with him in charge.

*************

Your turn! Answer the week's questions in the comments or link up your own post.

1. Do you have to cook for Thanksgiving?  If yes, what’s on the menu?  If no, high five!

2. What famous person would you like to invite to your family Thanksgiving?

3. Excluding family, health and basic needs met - what are 3 things that you are thankful for?

Next Week we're talking hospitality!

1. What's your go-to "someone's coming over" recipe?
2. You have 5 minutes to tidy before guest arrive. What are your tidying shortcuts?
3. What sort of music sets the mood for the perfect gathering?

Vintage Style? - A (Sort Of) Fashionable JEI

This week we're talking Fashion with The Zelie Group for JEI (Just Enough Info). I'm covering my favorite fashion era, the evolution of my fashion taste and my thoughts on vintage styling.

1. If you had to wear the clothes from another time period, when would it be?

The 40s or 50s. Those eras have cuts, patterns, and style that are what I generally pick out and that work for my body type.

Seriously, if I had an excuse to wear a dress like this I would do it in a heartbeat!

After wearing all dresses and skirts for many years now, I can say with confidence that I can take care of toddlers, do heavy cleaning, and any other tasks needed, in a skirt. Something that hits my knee, or lower, is my ideal length for feeling comfortable and confident - which just so happens to be the typical lengths of dresses in the 40s and 50s.

I do not own any true vintage pieces, but have had success looking for vintage inspired pieces in mainstream stores. For example, this is the swimsuit I currently own and found at Target.

This was at our rehearsal dinner. This dress has the look and feel of vintage but I found it at Ross for $12.

I do have some vintage jewelry I've inherited from relatives, and I'm working on wearing jewelry more regularly. I will occasionally try to style my hair in a vintage style, but I have long thick hair and sooner or later it's going to end up in a bun.

It is one of my guilty pleasures to watch Youtube channels of people are are into wearing vintage clothing and doing the whole vintage lifestyle. I don't think I really want to start my own vintage collection or anything, but I like their idea that you can have a little daily glamour in your life..

2. What are you embarrassed that you wore but used to think was cool?

This seems to imply I needed to have done cool things before.

Embarrassing things I've got loads of! But I didn't think they looked I cool (even then), I thought they were practical.
In middle school my uniform consisted of: running shoes, jeans (badly fitting), and one of my many A&M Vet or 4-H t-shirts. Eventually I discovered that wearing broomstick skirts and hippy skirts made it faster and easier to change and be comfortable going between classes, dance, and theater rehearsals. My feet were in far worse shape in high school, so I wore a lot of flip flops purely because anything more than that touching my feet hurt too bad.

It took most of high school and college to figure out what my true personal preferences were regarding style, color, and cut. I have never been particularly good at following trends and fads closely, I prefer to adapt what I have to echo trends without being too trendy. That has helped keep my clothing budget low, and allowed me to keep wearing pieces for years without fear of looking too dated.

3. What's your favorite article of clothing in your closet right now?

Maxi skirts!

Weirdly enough, I don't often wear them as maxi skirts. I'll pull them higher or lower to create different skirt lengths and silhouettes. 

I love these on days when I have long rehearsals or ballet class. They're easy to layer over my tights and leotard. I can pull them higher, add a belt and heels for more of an evening outfit. Sandals for a casual day outfit. They're one of the most comfortable things to wear on an airplane, but I'm not embarrassed to go straight to dinner in them.

Work horses of my wardrobe. Love 'em!

******************

Your turn! Answer the questions in your own post or in the comments!

1. If you had to wear the clothes from another time period, when would it be?

2. What are you embarrassed that you wore but used to think was cool?

3. What's your favorite article of clothing in your closet right now?

Next week we're talking about Thanksgiving!

1. Do you have to cook for Thanksgiving?  If yes, what’s on the menu?  If no, high five!

2. What famous person would you like to invite to your family Thanksgiving?

3. Excluding family, health and basic needs met - what are 3 things that you are thankful for?

The Challenges of Mercy - {JEI}

Linking up with The Zelie Group for JEI (Just Enough Info)!

1. What did (or can in these last few weeks!) your family do to mark the year? What are you thankful for?

We attended the opening of our diocese Holy Door last year. It was a long mass, but the kids got to come and actually did ok. We are parishioners at a Dominican parish and this Year of Mercy happened to coincide with the Dominican 800th Jubilee. A very blessed year in our neck 'o the woods!

I'm thankful for all of the opportunities that have come up in the past year, and especially for all the people who have come into my life. There have been people I have met in very unlikely circumstances, people who have stretched to meet me where I am, and people who I only met for the length of a conversation but that conversation planted deep roots.

2. What Work of Mercy is easiest or most challenging for you?

Most challenging for me: Bear Wrongs Patiently.

My family has a term for when you need to muster up your courage and insist that people pay attention and do what you need - "getting your Kirby on".
Believe it or not, I was a bit of a shy kid...until you crossed me. Then I had no problem getting in your face about it. It's a personality trait that has served me well in many a hairy situation, but I've had to work hard to learn how to let some wrongs work themselves out. Not all things are best served by putting your foot down. I'm not there yet, but I keep trying!

The Spiritual Works of Mercy are particularly challenging for me because they are internal works - the shaping and polishing those inner inclinations. They are works that show compassion, and are often uncomfortable and a challenge for discernment. Are you instructing your sister in mercy or being holier than thou? Are you showing the mercy of forgiveness externally while letting yourself seethe inside? Are you giving merciful comfort or enabling? These situations are not clear and have to be approached with prayerful consideration of the situation and of your own motivations.

Christianity isn't easy, but it is full of opportunity for growth! Thus I don't really have a Work of Mercy I don't struggle with in some way.

3. Do you have a story of mercy in your own life to share?  Or do you have a favorite saint/quote/resource to pass along?

Not really a single big story, but many many small ones.

My husband has probably managed to show me all seven of the Spiritual Works of Mercy, and more than a few of the Corporal Works of Mercy. I've sung his praises before, but he's a pretty awesome guy when it comes to showing mercy. I have much to learn from him!

I have this quote from St. Catherine of Siena on my dresser. These are the words I think about as I get ready for the day, whatever it brings. It is a reminder of what the fullness of mercy can do.

We received these prints from our Setting the World on Fire Conference last September, but you can find it in the Hatch Prints etsy shop if you want your own!

**************

Your turn! Answer the questions in the comments or link up a blog post!

Here they are again:

1. What did you do (or can in these last few weeks!) to mark the year?

2. What Work of Mercy is easiest or most challenging for you?

3. Do you have a story of mercy in your own life to share? Or do you have a favourite saint/quote/resource about mercy to pass along?

Next week we're talking clothing:

1. If you had to wear the clothes from another time period, when would it be?

2. What are you embarrassed that you wore but used to think was cool?

3. What's your favorite article of clothing in your closet right now?

JEI - Sports and Exercise Edition

Welcome back to another round of JEI (Just Enough Info) with The Zelie Group! This week we're talking about sports and exercise. Make sure to leave your answers in the comments, or link up your own blog post!

1. What sports do your kids play?

This weekend is John's last weekend of Soccer for the Fall!

This was his first year playing any sort of team sport, and it only happened because my husband completely took on the responsibility of signing him up, getting gear, and taking him to practice.

I think it's safe to say he's savoring this part of the father-son experience.

Therese gets to come too! But she mostly does this. And makes friends with the other adults on the sidelines. Can't keep an extrovert down...

Ballet is our other big addition for John this year.

As we'll discuss in a minute, Ballet is both art and sport for me. It's been a part of my life since I was a 4 year old, and it's been such a precious experience to start to share it with my kids.

John has caught on that he is the only boy in his class, but I don't think it bothers him much. He sees a few other boys who are in the next few levels up in their uniforms that are the same as his, and he's met some of my instructors who are incredibly talented male dancers.

2. What do you do for exercise?

Ballet (lots), Pilates, East Coast Swing, and hiking/walking probably count as my main exercise.

We live a pretty active life here. We don't have a car, so the kids and I walk somewhere between 2-4 miles in a typical day going for adventures and doing errands.

I get to take an open Ballet class once or twice a week, and I have a swing dance meet up every other week. (You can read more about this Ballet journey here.)That's not nearly enough to maintain, much less build, strength and muscle memory so I fill in the other days with specific workouts, at home barre exercises, and Pilates.

John has taken to doing a lot of the strengthening and toning work alongside me. I have some basic rules for working with the kids around. Everyone has to be on their own rug/mat and no climbing on anyone else. Therese struggles with that last rule greatly.

Matt took this during our last Choreography class of the summer ballet intensive.
Therese looked at it and said, "Oh, there's mama. Where me?" 

The swing dance meet up started when I met my dance partner, RJ. (Super cool new Jesuit deacon, and soon to be priest, that you'll learn more about tomorrow!) We both wanted more of a chance to dance and work on partnering. I agreed to swing dance if he would learn some ballet partnering (because you can't pas de deux by yourself!) It grew from there, and we're putting on our second big Swing Dance in just a few weeks!

I feel very strongly that it's important to find some form of exercise that is not a chore for you. Ballet still hurts (trust me!) but I love seeing how far I can push myself, and what physical limitations I can adapt to create something beautiful and new.

3. In the Mom Olympics, what would your event be?

If we're going purely off mom related skills, probably flipping kids onto my back.

I still wear the two year old in a back carry with an Ergo on the regular. When people see me put her up in the carrier, there is a normally mention of my "ninja mom skills". Mostly because I flip her up and around my head like Superman putting on a cape.

I want to tell them that my real ninja mom skill was that one time we had a horrendous library trip. Therese fell and was crying, John claimed to be too exhausted to walk any further, and I was carrying our 20+ typical library haul in a tote bag. I put Therese on my back, carried John in my arms, and the books in the bag uphill for half a mile.

I'm not sure if that's more "desperate times call for desperate measures" than skill, but I now know I can carry close to half my body weight for a decent distance. If I have to anyway.

**************

Your turn! Answer the following questions in the comments or link up a blog post!

1. What sports do your kids play?

2. What do you do for exercise?

3. In the Mom Olympics, what would your event be?

Next week JEI is about the Year of Mercy.

The Year of Mercy wraps up on November 20th.  

1. What did (or can in these last few weeks!) What are you thankful for?our family do to mark the year?

2. What Work of Mercy is easiest or most challenging for you?

3. Do you have a story of mercy in your own life to share?  Or do you have a favorite saint/quote/resource to pass along?

All Saints/All Souls 2016 - JEI

It's time for JEI (Just Enough Info) with The Zelie Group!

Link up your answers to this week's questions or answer in the comments!

This week we're talking about our upcoming feast days of All Saints and All Souls, and Halloween! 

1. How do you celebrate the All Saints’ Day and All Souls’ Day feasts?

I call these three days the Catholic Halloween Trifecta. Because why have one day for remembering the dead and dressing up when you could have THREE?!

We do Halloween big y'all.

All Saints - I have dreams of this day involving a pageant with other Catholic kids dressing up as their favorite saints. Right now we page through our saint books, watch a CCC saint movie, and talk about how awesome heaven must be.

All Souls - This is the day I focus on prepping our family altar for the month of remembering the dead. I cut out a big, red, construction paper heart and I write the names of all of our friends, family, and loved ones who have died. (This might be the year I make two. I'm gaining a lot of buddies waiting in heaven.)
Ideally we would visit a cemetery this day, but I think that will happen this Saturday instead.
We are planning on attending mass as a family this day to honor our family's little saint.

Our friend's are hosting an All Souls potluck the following weekend. We're supposed to bring drinks or dishes that mean a lot to us in memory of someone who has passed.
Kind of like a wake for everyone you've ever known.

I really love celebrating all three days because this is one of the few times in our society when discussion of death can be had when the deaths themselves are not as raw as they are at a funeral. As a Catholic kid growing up, the idea of the communion of saints was such a comfort, and these feast days are an opportunity to have a tactile interaction with that concept.

2. What was your favorite costume as a kid growing up?

My mom sewed my sister and I matching Thumbelina outfits one Halloween. I was very into Thumbelina since the movie had just come out that year, and my sister and I were used to being dressed alike. Being 10 months apart will do that.

(Y'all, I couldn't find one picture of this dress to show you that wasn't covered under copyright. Just google Thumbelina 1994 and you'll find some examples.)

3. What candy are you most likely to “test for safety” from the kiddo’s loot?

Well, I have a secret for y'all......I'm not really into chocolate. Or candy. Or really sugar.

It's not that I don't like it (I do!) but I never hit that "oh my gosh this tastes amazing and I want to keep eating it" thing. I feel a little bit like I'm missing out on some awesome human experience. I can see that other people very much enjoy these things. I love that you love it, ok?

Twix is probably the closest thing I have to enjoying chocolate. I'm a very not hipster milk chocolate + caramel person.

Your turn! Answer the following questions:

1. How do you celebrate the All Saints’ Day and All Souls’ Day feasts?

2. What was your favorite costume as a kid growing up?

3. What candy are you most likely to “test for safety” from the kiddo’s loot?

Next week - we're talking sports and exercise!
What sports do your kids play?
What do you do for exercise?
In the Mom Olympics, what would your event be?

JEI: Fall Edition!

It's Thursday! Link up time with The Zelie Group!

Best fall flavor:  apple or pumpkin?

Pumpkin is what screams Fall and comfort for me. I'm that super basic mom with a PSL and totally fine with that. :)

My husband grew up on the East Coast where things like going apple picking are an essential part of the Fall experience. That wasn't a thing where I grew up in Texas, and the nearest apple farms are a two hour drive from where we live now.
Aside from our homemade apple cider (aka apple juice we cook long and slow with whole spices) our kids probably are growing up associating pumpkin with Fall too.

The leaves are changing colors, and the air is crisp.  What are you looking forward to about fall?

I'm a big fan of Halloween. And All Souls. And All Saints. I pretty much don't miss a chance to party.
Summer is a bit of a slow time, liturgical year speaking. Once we hit Michaelmas the party train is rolling!

There's a major holiday at the end of every month for three months in a row, and Fall starts slow. That lets me take time to slowly make DIY decorations with the kids, think about new foods to cook, parties to throw, and dream up our celebrations with the husband.

Being married to a guy who can Pinterest harder than I might help. ;)

Do you decorate for the season (and which is it: fall or autumn?)

If the above didn't tell you already, YES!

Most of the decorations I'm making are very party specific, but I have two Fall wreaths and a garland I made a few years ago that I reuse every year.

The H stays attached to the wall and I change out the wreath around it for Fall, Winter, and Spring/Summer (because they're basically the same season in the Bay Area.)

We don't have a lot of decoration space in our little apartment, but doing these little seasonal changes are something I look forward to. I dream of having a porch, real front door, and mantle to decorate!

I call it Fall more out of habit then a thought out reasoning. I'll call the season Autumn if I'm trying to be fancy or just need an A alliteration thing going on.
In Texas we just called it "Football Season" so....

***************

Here are the questions again for y'all!

1. Best fall flavor: apple or pumpkin?

2. The leaves are changing colors, and the air is crisp. What are you looking forward to about fall?

3. Do you decorate for the season (and which is it: fall or autumn?)

If you're a reader, answer in the comments. Link up a post if you have a blog!

What I Wish People Knew About Being Pro-life

It's Thursday, so link up time with The Zelie Group! 

It's JEI (Just Enough Info) but I'm digging pretty deep today. As always, if you want to talk more, comment or hit up one of my contact methods on the sidebar. 

Does your family or parish mark the month in a special way?

October is a bittersweet month for our family. The one year anniversary of our miscarriage is in a little less than two weeks from today. 

We have a small family altar, and I like to put particular holy cards or mementos on the altar in memory of those who are no longer with us.

I do wish our parish would mark this month. This is not the year for me to be in charge of it, but memorial masses for lost children, additional outreach to the ill and homebound, or special rosaries would mean a lot.

Do you have any books or resources to recommend on the Respect Life theme?

Honestly, there are so many good resources out there and they're so easy to find on the internet. What is tricky to finding out where we each need to grow.

I think we all have some growing to do in order to work towards creating a society where all humans are seen and valued as persons.

One of our great faults as a society, in my experience, is we don't know how to be there for someone who is grieving or struggling. Their hurt seems big and scary, and we're often so terrified of doing the wrong thing we do nothing.

We try and force "moving on" by acting like things are fine or that the hurting will be over soon.
I'll let you in on a little secret - it's never "fine". It will never be the same once a person has gone through something that hard.

What every grieving, hurting, person needs is someone to reach in, see their humanity, and be there.
How you do that varies drastically from person to person.

I know a lot of women who do that by feeding people. They are the ones who will show up with full, hot, meals on your doorstep plus a little extra to "eat on later". It doesn't matter if a new baby was born, someone just had surgery, or a loved one died. These ladies will make sure you don't starve.
Food can be a beautiful love language.

Plenty others have a gift for listening. They can listen to you ramble and struggle to put your conflicting thoughts and emotions into words and never feel the need to shut you down.

Keep inviting those people into the community and to do fun stuff. Even if they don't go, being asked means you still wanted them to be a part of your life and that they still matter.

Don't be afraid to embrace another person. Sometimes a hug is all it takes for some of that emotional healing movement to happen.

Don't wait to be asked. Step into any needs you see. Sometimes the best thing you can do is help the ones who are supporting those who are grieving.

What do you wish others understood about the Respect Life message?

The biggest thing is that it is a whole person idea. If you're pro-life you have to be pro-ALL human life.

It's a pretty simple bar: we don't kill people, and we don't decide which humans are people. Boom.

It's not a hard concept, yet we, as a society, struggle to accept it.

Just stop and think about how much time we, as a society, have WASTED arguing about who counts as human. How much of a narcissistic God-complex must one have to think we can decide who should count as human?!

Yet our society does it every day.

It's really easy y'all. Everybody counts.
Even criminals.
Even the smallest clump of a human blastocyst.
Even the insane.
Even the terminally ill.
Even those in such physical pain they are suicidal.

*************************

If you have more questions about some of the topics I've touched on here, feel free to leave a comment or email me (underthyroof@gmail.com). I'm happy to talk more, and I'll help as much as I can. If I don't know the answer, I (probably) know where to find it!

Leave your answers to this week's questions in the comments or link up if you've got a blog!

Make sure you read the rules of the link up, and follow each of your hosts in some way!

Jessica – Pinot Noir and Prayers | Instagram | Facebook

Alicia – Sweeping Up Joy | Pinterest | Facebook
Kirby (me!)  – Under Thy Roof | Instagram | Facebook
Kerry - Fishbowl Fortune | Instagram | Facebook

Next week's questions are on Autumn/Fall Fun!

Best fall flavor:  apple or pumpkin?

The leaves are changing colors, and the air is crisp.  What are you looking forward to about fall?

Do you decorate for the season (and which is it: fall or autumn?)