What I Wish People Knew About Being Pro-life

Wednesday, October 5, 2016

It's Thursday, so link up time with The Zelie Group
It's JEI (Just Enough Info) but I'm digging pretty deep today. As always, if you want to talk more, comment or hit up one of my contact methods on the sidebar. 

Does your family or parish mark the month in a special way?

October is a bittersweet month for our family. The one year anniversary of our miscarriage is in a little less than two weeks from today. 

We have a small family altar, and I like to put particular holy cards or mementos on the altar in memory of those who are no longer with us.

I do wish our parish would mark this month. This is not the year for me to be in charge of it, but memorial masses for lost children, additional outreach to the ill and homebound, or special rosaries would mean a lot.

Do you have any books or resources to recommend on the Respect Life theme?

Honestly, there are so many good resources out there and they're so easy to find on the internet. What is tricky to finding out where we each need to grow.

I think we all have some growing to do in order to work towards creating a society where all humans are seen and valued as persons.

One of our great faults as a society, in my experience, is we don't know how to be there for someone who is grieving or struggling. Their hurt seems big and scary, and we're often so terrified of doing the wrong thing we do nothing.

We try and force "moving on" by acting like things are fine or that the hurting will be over soon.
I'll let you in on a little secret - it's never "fine". It will never be the same once a person has gone through something that hard.

What every grieving, hurting, person needs is someone to reach in, see their humanity, and be there.
How you do that varies drastically from person to person.

I know a lot of women who do that by feeding people. They are the ones who will show up with full, hot, meals on your doorstep plus a little extra to "eat on later". It doesn't matter if a new baby was born, someone just had surgery, or a loved one died. These ladies will make sure you don't starve.
Food can be a beautiful love language.

Plenty others have a gift for listening. They can listen to you ramble and struggle to put your conflicting thoughts and emotions into words and never feel the need to shut you down.

Keep inviting those people into the community and to do fun stuff. Even if they don't go, being asked means you still wanted them to be a part of your life and that they still matter.

Don't be afraid to embrace another person. Sometimes a hug is all it takes for some of that emotional healing movement to happen.

Don't wait to be asked. Step into any needs you see. Sometimes the best thing you can do is help the ones who are supporting those who are grieving.

What do you wish others understood about the Respect Life message?

The biggest thing is that it is a whole person idea. If you're pro-life you have to be pro-ALL human life.

It's a pretty simple bar: we don't kill people, and we don't decide which humans are people. Boom.

It's not a hard concept, yet we, as a society, struggle to accept it.

Just stop and think about how much time we, as a society, have WASTED arguing about who counts as human. How much of a narcissistic God-complex must one have to think we can decide who should count as human?!

Yet our society does it every day.

It's really easy y'all. Everybody counts.
Even criminals.
Even the smallest clump of a human blastocyst.
Even the insane.
Even the terminally ill.
Even those in such physical pain they are suicidal.


If you have more questions about some of the topics I've touched on here, feel free to leave a comment or email me (underthyroof@gmail.com). I'm happy to talk more, and I'll help as much as I can. If I don't know the answer, I (probably) know where to find it!

Leave your answers to this week's questions in the comments or link up if you've got a blog!
Make sure you read the rules of the link up, and follow each of your hosts in some way!

Alicia – Sweeping Up Joy | Pinterest | Facebook
Kirby (me!)  – Under Thy Roof | Instagram | Facebook
Kerry - Fishbowl Fortune | Instagram | Facebook

Next week's questions are on Autumn/Fall Fun!

Best fall flavor:  apple or pumpkin?
The leaves are changing colors, and the air is crisp.  What are you looking forward to about fall?
Do you decorate for the season (and which is it: fall or autumn?)


  1. You have boiled the RespectLife movement down to its essence--. ALL life. Period. The end. Thank you for sharing!

  2. Beautiful Kirby!! I always want to share with people that a pro life stance is reasonable. It makes sense and is backed by science.

    I know well that there can be hard situations, but let's find ways as a community to support all the people involved.

    1. Right?! That just seems like, you know, the HUMAN thing to do.

  3. I'm so sorry it's a sad time for you. Thanks for linking up with us :)

  4. I'm very sorry that this is a difficult time for you and your family. A miscarriage is never something one can easily forget. I miscarried in Aug. 2011 and the memories are still fresh in my mind and heart. While I will always carry that child in my heart, and prayers, the pain doesn't ever seem to go away, but you end up learning to live with it.

    The worse thing that I have noticed is to tell anyone to "move on" or pressure them to get over it. Unless a person goes through that, or any serious real loss that affects them, the "moving on" stage is as individual as each of us.

    I will pray for you as you approach your one year. God Bless.

  5. I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I had a miscarriage on January 1st (The feast of the Solemnity of Mary) and I always try to light a candle in my babies honor, this upcoming January will be 7 years. I will keep you and your family in my prayers!